Use your powers for good. If you talk someone into something they really don’t want to do, they will usually back out later.
Chris Voss is an ex FBI hostage negotiator that knows how to get people to do what he says.
In this episode Chris shares some seemingly counter intuitive techniques to talk anyone into doing anything. Come into this one with your moral compass in hand as you’ll be needing it.
How To Talk ANYONE Into Doing
ANYTHING by Steve Schappert
The notion of “talking anyone into doing anything” raises ethical concerns, as it implies manipulation or coercion. Instead, let’s focus on how to effectively persuade and influence others in a positive and ethical manner. Here are some principles and strategies you can use to persuade and influence people in a way that respects their autonomy and choices:
- Understand Their Perspective: Before trying to persuade someone, take the time to understand their viewpoint, needs, and motivations. Empathy and active listening are key to effective communication.
- Build Trust: Trust is essential for persuasion. Establish a trustworthy reputation by consistently delivering on promises, being honest, and acting with integrity.
- Highlight Mutual Benefits: Focus on how your proposal or idea can benefit both parties. Show how it aligns with their goals, needs, or values to create a win-win situation.
- Provide Evidence and Logic: Back up your arguments with factual information, data, and logical reasoning. People are more likely to be persuaded when they see a rational basis for your proposal.
- Appeal to Emotions: Emotions can play a significant role in decision-making. Connect emotionally by telling relatable stories or demonstrating how your idea can evoke positive feelings.
- Show Expertise: Establish yourself as a knowledgeable and credible source in the relevant subject matter. People are more likely to be influenced by those they perceive as experts.
- Reciprocity: Offer something of value to the other person before asking for something in return. This principle of reciprocity can create a sense of obligation.
- Social Proof: Demonstrate how others have benefited from or supported your idea. People often look to the actions of others for guidance, especially in uncertain situations.
- Authority: Present your idea as endorsed or supported by credible authorities or experts in the field.
- Scarcity: Highlight the limited availability or time-sensitive nature of your proposal. People may be more motivated to take action if they believe an opportunity is scarce.
- Address Objections: Anticipate and address potential objections or concerns the other person might have. This shows that you’ve thoughtfully considered their perspective.
- Offer Flexibility: Provide options and let the other person feel like they have some control over the decision. This can make them more receptive to your proposal.
- Use Positive Framing: Present your idea in a positive light by emphasizing the benefits and opportunities rather than focusing on drawbacks.
- Be Persistent but Respectful: It’s okay to follow up and reiterate your points, but avoid being pushy or aggressive. Respect the other person’s boundaries and decisions.
- Listen and Adapt: Pay attention to the other person’s feedback and adjust your approach if needed. Flexibility shows that you value their input.
Remember, the goal is not to “talk anyone into doing anything” against their will, but rather to ethically and effectively communicate your ideas and proposals in a way that resonates with their interests and values. Building authentic relationships, understanding their needs, and presenting compelling arguments are key to successful persuasion.
